rip out my heart and leave my soul empty
by AlwaysPadfoot
Summary: Sirius wakes up in agony, but he's not being attacked - they are.


**A/N:** Prompts, as always, are displayed at the bottom.

 _ **~ Warning: Character Death ~**_

* * *

 **rip out my heart and leave my soul empty**

 **AlwaysPadfoot**

* * *

 _ **For Sophy**_

 _ **who asked for James/Sirius/Lily**_

* * *

Sirius was lying in bed alone when he felt pain rip through his body like he had never felt before.

A scream broke free from his lips as he threw the covers back and scrambled for his wand. He was gasping for breath as his lumos spell lit his vision and colours illuminated his eyes. He desperately willed his vision back as he scrambled to his feet, his wand pointing in every direction — a useless threat really considering how pathetic he must look.

When his surroundings bled back in he was faced with an empty room.

'Who's there?'

He cast a revealing charm as his eyes searched every corner. The spell ebbed blue; there was no one there. If there was no one in his house then—

Fear sunk deep into his stomach. One of his soulmates was in trouble; Lily and James — they were in trouble. Sirius didn't even stop to think; he snatched up a coat and apparated to Godric's Hollow.

Because of the wards that usually surrounded the thatch-roofed house that James and Lily lived in, Sirius apparated to a spot down the street. As soon as he got there he started running. Concrete cold against his bare feet, he ignored the pain that shot through him every time he stepped on something sharp. Sirius was more focused on the pain making his whole body throb.

Just as the house broke into sight, the same excruciating pain he'd felt in bed collided with him and forced him to his knees with a strangled cry. Tears sprung to his eyes. Sirius had felt them in pain before, but never had he felt like this.

He feared the worse. And when, suddenly, the familiar smell of acrid smoke filled his nostrils, Sirius' whole body shook violently. It couldn't be the worst; it couldn't be them — not his James and Lily. He forced himself upright, staggering slightly as he readjusted his balance, and pushed through the pain. He was starting to feel cold. It wasn't even that cold of a October night and yet it seeped deep into his body as he ran the last few metres to the gate of James and Lily's.

The front door was blown off it's hinges.

Sirius' body seemed to get weaker and weaker as he rushed through the door frame. Then he stopped, paralysed with emotion as his eyes fell to the body lying in the darkened entrance. His knees gave out and he had to cling to what was left of the door frame to stay upright. After a moment, unable to breathe, Sirius staggered forward and dropped to his knees at the side of his soulmate's body.

James's eyes were fixed upwards, unmoving, as Sirius reached out with shaking fingers in search of a pulse. A broken sob escaped his lips when he found nothing. He put his head on James's chest; his shoulders were shaking as he sobbed.

He could feeling himself crumbling fast.

Suddenly the cry of a child above him made his head snap up. 'Harry.'

Sirius placed a kiss on James's forehead and then gently shut his eyes with his fingers. Harry was still alive; Sirius had to find him. He took the stairs two at a time, made a sharp left into the nursery, and came to a fast halt upon seeing Lily's body. Sirius clutched his chest; it felt as though someone was squeezing his heart, trying to get every last drop of blood from the chambers inside.

Harry's crying echoed inside his head. 'Si'wus. Si'wus.'

The one-year-old was gripping the bars of his crib, his face puffy and eyes wet. It seemed as though the room was tilting as Sirius went over a scooped Harry up into his arms. Harry quietened upon being picked up, and yet, inside Sirius's head his thoughts were so loud. He slid down beside Lily. Her skin was pale and the green in her eyes had begun to dull. Her red hair was strewn across her face; Sirius reached out and pushed the it back out of the way, tears blurring his vision as he repeated his actions from downstairs.

Harry put a small hand out towards his mother. 'Mummy.'

Sirius held him tighter and whispered. 'It's okay; it's going to be okay.'

That was what he said when he had nothing else to say; when Sirius was barely holding on, with both his soulmates dead, he had to say something — for Harry.

* * *

 **Gift Prompt:** JamesLilySirius / Soulmate!AU / Angst and First War Stuff

 **Hogwarts:** November Character Showcase: Sirius Black (Prompt: survivor)

 **Word Count:** 748


End file.
